Last night, was horrific. I was not myself. I was wrong. I literally beat down a door for over an hour and caused the girl I love to lay in her bed crying, scared to death, thinking i’m going to break in and do something to her. I know where she gets these thoughts, I was a fucking lunatic. From this day forward, no more thinking about myself before her. She comes first. Her happiness, her state of mind, her schedule, her practice time, especially her alone time. I am going to respect and correctly handle the situations at hand in the right manor and not blow up like I did last night. That’s a promise. I use to get jealous over the stupidest shit. A little heart by his name, Him coming to your house, you talking to him… just him in general. It was immature and childish and the fights that have occurred sure as fuck did not fix the situation but broke us more, made our hole even deeper. I was focused on him and what he was saying to you instead of realizing I already had you, you weren’t going anywhere. I realize that now. I wasted so much time on useless shit because of jealousy. No more of that. I mean I did have some sort of right to be jealous but anyways, I have no where to stand on the matter. She told me we will never be together again and I can’t change that. It’s time to step up to the plate and eat crow. Here is to a new change, in myself, and putting other people before myself.
.
.
I love you, Hope Aaron Adair.